Should i go places alone




















I understand that. It will be a new experience for you and there are mind blowing reasons why you should start experiencing new things! The truth is that going places alone does NOT make you look like a loser; it makes you look and feel self-confident. And traveling alone? Soooo, do you feel comfortable go places alone? Please share why or why not below in the comments! After a while, she trusted that I would do the right thing at the sight of danger, and more importantly, I trusted myself.

Confession: One night, after skinny dipping on a Mexican beach, I had to sprint home barefoot an entire mile after losing my flip flops, woooops.

I made it home safe, sound, and sweaty. I do have to say that the sketch-o-meter has gotten pretty high at times, especially when I went to Egypt. We get so caught up in the distractions of technology, in what society wants us to think and do, and in how our friends and family expects of us that we never actually give ourselves a chance to just be.

It was 3 am in the morning, and I was already on the streets of Manila. As a woman, I would normally be scared during Where my expats at? By Zoe Abdel-Moneim. By Damon Dominique. Keep up to date with our stories and travel tips and sign up to our newsletter. You've successfully joined our list. Stay tuned for awesome traveling stories. Sorry an error occurred while trying to add you to the list. Previous Next. By Nellie Khossousi January 27, 10 min read.

Follow us. Crafted with by. Search Type and press enter. Featured Stories Play the video. My friends just texted me to say they can't make it Go to large, crowded clubs where no one will notice you're by yourself. Don't draw unwanted scrutiny by being poorly dressed or blatantly outside the venue's demographic. Avoid lingering in one spot too long. Constantly circulate instead and act as if you're on a mission of some sort; going to get a drink, looking for your friends, etc. If you're worried about how people see you these tactics can ease your nerves a little.

However, they can just as easily pile on the stress as now you have to worry about keeping up your "cover". Also, once you're in a conversation with someone they may still ask where your friends are.

If you're a woman and want to attend a book reading or see a play, your experience probably won't be much different from anyone else's. However, if you go to a bustling bar or club on your own you may get hit on too much and not be able to socialize like you had hoped to.

Some guys believe that any woman who goes to a bar by herself is only looking to get picked up. On the link below you'll find a training series focused on how to feel at ease socially, even if you tend to overthink today. It also covers how to avoid awkward silence, attract amazing friends, and why you don't need an "interesting life" to make interesting conversation. Click here to go to the free training. I don't want to be discouraging, but I also want to be straightforward: Going out alone can work, but it's usually more stressful, more difficult, more hit or miss, and less fun than going out with friends.

Yeah, it's easy enough to adjust to seeing the odd movie or concert by yourself, but it's a whole other animal to get to a point where you're consistently able to go out to bars on your own and have a good time. If you just want to meet people or practice socializing , there are better places to put your energy.

That said, if you can cultivate it, it is a handy skill to be able to rely on yourself and show up anywhere and stand a decent chance of having a good time. Since going out alone offers fewer ways to have fun, it's extra important you go somewhere you like. If you're at a boring club that's not your style, but you're with friends, you can still enjoy each others company and save the night.

If you're by yourself it's probably all going to be a waste of time. You won't feel as comfortable talking to strangers, and the ones you do chat to are less likely to have anything in common with you. The exception to this point is if you're purposely putting yourself into an unfamiliar, difficult situation to practice socializing in it. As I'm beating into the ground, going out alone is harder and less predictable. Accept going in that on some nights you'll feel too nervous to talk to anyone.

Sometimes you'll start a few conversations, but they won't go anywhere. That's why I said it's better to go places you'd have fun at anyway. If you want to get better at going out alone you really have to focus on your long-term progress, and not on how any single outing goes.

Other articles on the site cover the "hows" of socializing when you're alone. I mentioned them already, but these articles should help with your nerves:. There's no special trick to starting conversations with people you don't know.

The hardest part is usually gathering up the nerve to walk over to them and say something. How they respond will be more based on what type of person they perceive you to be and whether they're in the mood to talk, rather than whether you used the right opening line or not.

If you're getting along with someone and can see yourself hanging out with them later, the usual principles of making friends apply, like taking the initiative to get their contact info and then following up to try to hang out with them again. If you go to one establishment enough, and get to know the staff and existing regulars a little every time you're there, then eventually it won't feel like you're going alone.

It will be more like you're dropping in at a club where you're a member. Odds are good you'll run into someone you can talk to, and even if you just hang out by yourself, you won't have any thoughts about sticking out or not belonging.

If you're self-assured and chatty enough you can go out alone wherever you want, but I'll assume you're not at that point yet. Here's a list of places that are easier and more difficult if you're shy about going out on your own to try to meet people:. This one's a modifier. Like I said, it feels simpler to go out alone when you can tell yourself you have a respectable excuse for doing it.

Being new to the area, or not being from there at all, gives you that. You'll also get slightly better reactions when you try to start conversations, since many people see travelers and new arrivals as more shiny and interesting. If you show up to one of these solo you're technically going out alone, but they have so many built-in supports that it doesn't really feel in the same ballpark as fending for yourself at a nightclub. They have an activity to do, so you have a reason to be there aside from socializing.

You have plenty of natural opportunities to talk to the other people there, and you've got a least one interest in common. Some examples:.

You've still got a reason to be there and a green light to chat to anyone you'd like to, but they're a little harder since you don't have an activity to lean on. You'll have to start conversations and work the room yourself. For example, a skate park or a pool hall. Here you've got a hobby in common with everyone there, but you still have to begin your own conversations. While you can assume many of the people will be pleasant, they're not all there purposely to meet new friends, and so you may get the odd colder reception.

This is an option at some universities, where people may throw big, well-advertised parties that anyone can show up to. If you don't know anyone at them they're almost like a glorified nightclub. You all go to the same college though, so on the whole people should be approachable, and you've got a bunch of school-related topics you can hopefully find some commonalities on.

Odds are you'll see at least a few familiar faces, who you can say 'hi' to, so you won't feel totally by yourself either.

At smaller, more gossipy schools you may have to be mindful of your reputation and not go to too many parties on your own. If that's the case, focus on making friends in other ways. Clubs can be intimidating at first, which is why I put them farther down the list, but once you're used to them it can be easier to talk to people there than in other spots. There's an understanding that strangers regularly approach each other at them.

There are lots of people to potentially chat to, and you can seek out the ones who seem the friendliest. If one person or group isn't receptive you can move on to another.

If you're nervous about starting a conversation you can blend into the crowd and take all the time you need to summon up your courage. The easiest and most fun clubs to go to are ones that cater to a smaller, close-knit scene or demographic you belong to. They have a more accepting, community vibe to them, as opposed to more mainstream spots where everyone sees everyone else as a stranger.

You'll feel more at ease being there and starting conversations because it feels like you're dropping in to visit your "people".

It's fairly easy to become a regular at places like this. Scene-specific venues aren't always available.



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